Wine-Induced Fuckwhittery

There are moments in life when you can pinpoint the exact second everything went wrong. For me, it was somewhere between my second sip of Merlot and the words… “How hard could this possibly be?” My husband was out for the evening. The dishes were finally done. The kids were asleep. The house was quiet. I had nowhere to be, nobody to impress, and, for the first time in weeks, an entire evening to myself. Naturally, I decided this was the perfect time to perform cosmetic procedures I’d never attempted before. I’d bought one of those at-home waxing kits months […]